My Story - Brendan Fevola
Hi, I’m Brendan and I am 40 years old. Despite having an incredible family and a job that I have always loved, my life hasn’t always been smooth sailing.
My struggles with a gambling addiction have been publicised but it’s important for me to tell my own story.
I started gambling in my late teens but it wasn’t until after my football career that it really started to consume me, and I started to see how it could ruin the lives of those I cared about.
When you’re betting, it’s easy to feel detached from the money. Like it isn’t even real. You’re just constantly chasing cheap thrills. And when you win a lot of the time you just see it as more free money to bet with. The more money you win, the more you can allow yourself to bet, you sort of start making those sort of justifications in your mind.
I think that’s what really opened my eyes, the impact my actions were having on my wife and kids.
It has only been through hard work, strict limits, trust and communication that I have been able to regain control of my life and the love and support of my wife.
Now my relationship with my family and gambling has improved greatly. I have been able to have fun with it again. It’s a part of my life as entertainment, no longer an escape. It’s something I have control for and have been able to budget.
Why do people gamble?
Being aware of why you gamble can be very helpful if you want to change. There are four main reasons why people gamble:
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For social reasons
This may be because it’s what a group of friends do when they get together, or because it makes a social gathering more enjoyable.
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For financial reasons
To win money, because someone enjoys thinking about what they would do if they won a jackpot, or because winning would change someone’s lifestyle.
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For entertainment reasons
Because they like the feeling, to get that rush or “high”, or because it makes them feel good.
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For coping reasons
For someone to forget their worries, because they feel more self-confident, or because it helps when they are feeling nervous or depressed.
Signs of harm from gambling
Harm from gambling is about more than just losing money. Gambling also impacts self-esteem, social life, physical and mental health, work performance and personal relationships. The harm from gambling extends past the person who gambles and can impact family, friends, workplaces and communities. There are some signs of gambling harm that you can be conscious of.
Initial signs of harm:
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Having less time or money to spend on recreation and family -
Reduced savings
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Increased consumption of alcohol
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Feelings of guilt or regret
Advanced signs of harm:
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Relationship conflict
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Reduced work or study performance
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Financial difficulties
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Anger
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Feelings of shame and hopelessness
Need Some Help?
Bet Nation is committed to educating and supporting those who are struggling with their relationship to gambling.
https://www.gamblinghelponline.org.au/ or 1800 858 858